When God is Silent....

Todd woke me up to tell me that my 106 year old Grandpa passed away at 0500 am. My 100 year old Grandma is rejoicing in Saskatchewan that my grandpa is in heaven with Jesus . . . can you imagine 106 years old?

Today it feels like a huge load has been lifted. Kourtney is not just a little better . . . she is much better. Her spirits, her colour, her attitude, her pain and her sores are enjoying the extra oxygen and antibiotic relief.

I just started to read "When God is Silent" by Swindoll. One of things that struck me is Job's depression through his trials. Although he did not curse God he did ask God "why" and that God was silent. The author gives some practical statements through Life's Trials:

1. There are days too dark for the sufferer to see light.
2. There are experiences too extreme for the hurting to have Hope.
3. There are valleys too deep for the anguished to find relief.

God does not respond and say, "Shame on you" for feeling like that because God can handle your words. You never get over grief completely until you express if fully. Don't hold back. Reading Kourtney's blog over the last month, I think I have expressed my grief, and in turn I have found comfort in people's interest, comforting words and support through these difficult times.

As torturous as the last 4 months have been, I can say that I believe more in God and his promises of faithfulness than I ever have. I believe that the medical team that has now been put into place for Kourtney is strong and will assist me through her years, and Kourtney will learn to trust them and start making her disease her own, and make decisions for herself.
Kourtney's insight is so deep already. One day a friend of mind came into the house and hugged Shaelyn and then said to Kourtney, "I would hug you but I don't want to hurt you." Kourtney said, "It hurts me more if I don't get hugged than the blister you would make if you hugged me."

Although, Kourtney still isn't out of the woods yet, we are thankful that she will at least enjoy a comfortable Christmas. We are praying that the "combo" works in her favour and her immunity will be boosted and the bugs will be eradicated.....!

Yesterday, Kourtney told the plastic surgeon that she was still waiting for the brain transplant for her mom. (For more info regarding that see blog January 2006!!!)

We will continue the updates....